Developing
A Reflective Life In The Midst Of Turmoil
One of the
most important things you can do in life is to simply find time
for yourself. By this, we don't mean opting out of society or "spacing
out". Value yourself enough to give yourself time to simply
be, without any expectation of goal or result. Paradoxically,
by doing this, we can often achieve far more in our externally
focused lives than we otherwise might.
When our lives
are primarily externally focused, it becomes easy to lose sight
of the gameplan. What are we doing all this for? What is the
point of it all? Like too many stressed out corporate "high-fliers",
we may reach the very top of the ladder, only to find that it
is leaning against the wrong wall. The joy of simply living all
too easily evaporates as we postpone our pleasure for some unspecified
future date. We don't allow ourselves to be happy NOW, but instead
promise ourselves that when we have got that promotion, or fallen
in love with that ideal partner, or had that baby, bought that
new home, or become a millionaire, THEN we can be happy. Meanwhile
the present time, which in truth is all we ever really have,
quietly slips away.
The biggest
trap is to work for money. Many people do this assuming that
once a certain amount of money has been amassed in the bank,
or once they can see the sheer immensity of their assets laid
out before them, THEN they will be truly happy. Again, it is
an utter illusion. The truth is that you have to prepare your
mindset for wealth first or else (a) you will never truly achieve
it because your inner mind will forever act to keep you within
your comfort zone or, (b) if you do achieve it, you will not
have developed the habits of mind to be content with it anyway.
Tony Robbins
tells about how much he wanted to become a millionaire but once
he actually achieved it, the thrill lasted for about ten minutes.
After that, everything felt just the same as before. Yes, there
are many millionaires who are happy. However, there are many
who are as equally miserable. In fact, many of the latter would
agree that their prime cause of sorrow is the money itself; fear
of losing it, dissatisfaction at not being as rich as so-and-so
who is worth ten times more, etc. The key point is that money
itself is not the determiner of happiness and purpose. A correct
state of mind IS.
Capturing our
purpose is THE most important thing we can possibly do. It is
not the work of a moment, an hour or even of a few days. It is
an ongoing project that brings more riches each and every day.
By doing this, we discover who we really are and why exactly
we are here. The truth is that you are here for a purpose. You
manifested into this life for a reason. So how do we go about
discovering this purpose?
The first thing
is simply to make time for yourself. Treat yourself as precious
and important and find times to be alone in quiet reflection
upon your life. Many people meditate to gain deeper insights
about themselves. This is certainly immensely valuable. However,
if you feel uncomfortable with meditation at this stage, then
simply creating moments in the day when you can ponder and wonder
can be deeply beneficial.
At several
points in the day, try simply closing your eyes and taking a
deep breath. Turn your attention inward and remember whatever
it is you need to, and as you let your breath out exhale all
your tension and concerns. David Kundtz, in his excellent book "Stopping",
calls these brief moments in the day "Stillpoints".
They are easier to do than meditation because they only take
a few seconds. However, if you do about fifteen or so of these
a day, it can make a tremendous difference
to your inner calm and perspective on life.
You can also
do what Kundtz calls "Stopovers". These are slightly
longer breaks lasting from several minutes to several hours,
where you take time to specifically do NOTHING. This is important.
There is no agenda. You simply give yourself time to BE. You
listen to your body and what it has to say.
You listen
to your inner intuition and gradually develop the ability to
hear its valuable insights. You develop Openness and gradually
by-pass the inner critic that filters out what you heart's desire
really is with negative thinking and being "realistic" By
giving yourself more time to simply be and experience your own "beingness" without
preconditions, you gradually awaken to what your soul's purpose
is, one step at a time.
(C) September
2000 Asoka Selvarajah.
______________________________________________________________
Dr. Asoka Selvarajah
publishes the ezine, "Aspire To Wisdom"; a unique
synthesis of Personal Development, combined with Spiritual
Growth/Metaphysical Teachings. It is available at
http://www.aksworld.com/AspireToWisdom.htm .
You can visit his Mystic Visions website at http://www.aksworld.com .
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