A Life Without Worry: Is It Possible?
If you need to know the answer now: No, life without worry is not possible. People do worry, and will worry, to the end of their lives. The question is: How much worrying is O.K.?
The whole story about worry is this: If you worry, you are alive. If you do not worry at all, you are probably dead. If you worry too much, you might suffer from general anxiety disorder or are simply a worrier. Unfortunately, worry is not limited to those who have general anxiety disorder.
Why do people worry too much? They probably learned it in early childhood from overprotective parents, cannot tolerate uncertainty, or think that they will prevent bad things before happening. When they worry, people feel more secure and believe that it helps them, which is not true. Sometimes people worry that they worry too much. The circle is closed. Worriers worry about worries, and it becomes a chronic state for many. Constantly being in the state of expecting the worst is not healthy, and such people know that. Do not tell them: Do not worry; be happy. They already know that and will resent you for this unproductive statement.
The problem with being in a state of worry is that it controls job performance, ruins relationships, supports a compulsive personality, and makes people uncomfortable in many situations. All these negative influence can make a person depressed as well. People who worry too much struggle every day, fighting against reality. They do not want to accept limitations, uncertainty, or things that they do not like or believe. Sometimes you cannot do anything about a situation but must accept what life brings you.
Worriers do not live in the present time, which is a huge problem. They constantly live in the future and want to control it. But, who has the magic ball to see what the future will bring them? This attitude is the main problem with worrying too much: “I want to know it right now. I want the answer now. I want to be sure now.”
This need to be certain now has devastating consequences. People feel out of control, confused, anxious and fearful, act like children and ask unanswerable questions. Sometimes they act unpredictably themselves. Worriers think too much, instead of dealing with emotions. Those who worry try to avoid unpleasant emotions. The reality, however, is that if such people want to accept emotions, they must experience those feelings but chose not to do.
Now, you have a bigger picture of people who worry too much, and I believe you that you better understand them. If you are around them, please do not blame them, but help them. Most worriers and those with general anxiety disorder are very knowledgeable about their condition. They suffer much and need your support, not your judgment.